Sex and the City: Revolutionary, yet Controversial

 

If we were to reconstruct the world of tv shows in the early '90s, it would be a crime not to mention the Sex and the City series, which many have probably relished in watching at the time. As time went by, the public’s opinions regarding this series retained their duality, some sustaining it is a revolutionary feminist manifestation, others arguing it is a shallow and problematic cheap comedy show. Before diving into depicting each of those two perspectives, we have to acknowledge that, hated or loved, Sex and the City was extremely popular at its time and, still, to this day, it attracts viewers with the humane, relatable characters, the catchy plot-line and the non-conformist topics approached. In fact, the show is mentioned even by the former first lady of the United States, Michelle Obama, in her autobiographical novel, Becoming. Moreover, its maintaining popularity determined HBO to plan revival of the show which is in the making right at this moment, reuniting three out of four of the main actresses: Sarah Jessica Parker, Cynthia Nixon and Kristin Davis – a perfect occasion to take a trip down memory lane and see what exactly makes Sex and the City still reach the public in the second decade of the 21^st century, but also what are the aspects that made it controversial and problematic at times.

Well, let’s begin with the title which announces the main theme of the show: sex. I know, outrageous: four single women talking about sex and relationships in their 30s. However, as the show has evolved throughout the seasons (and the two movies that followed), people realised the provocation that it brought to the small screens regarded publicly addressing not only women’s sexual lives, but also the issues they face in their professional and personal lives after they reach a certain age. Moreover, it shed light upon the idea of single women working hard to build a life on their own and fulfil their dreams – an image most of us can relate to. Aside from encouraging independent women to pursue their aspirations, Sex and the City also reminded viewers of the importance of the support that women should show one another. Despite being four very different personalities, Carrie, Miranda, Charlotte and Samantha show respect and consideration towards each other, even when they don’t see eye to eye. In fact, the differences between them make it easier for all audience members to find something to relate to, whether it’s Samantha’s free spirit, Miranda’s analytical mind, Charlotte’s cautiousness or Carrie’s creativity. The show definitely has something to match all taste.

However, despite the diverse personalities of the characters, in terms of racial and sexual representation, Sex and the City proves to be lacking the diversity and open-minded attitude we might expect from it. After three decades of existence, it’s clearer more than ever that the show focuses mainly on white race representation, the only people of colour presented being marginal characters that rarely made an appearance. As for the representation of the LGBTQ+ community, the series managed to include a few queer characters, which was a brave choice in the ´90s, but eventually failed to develop their story enough to create more than a stereotypical image. Stanford Blatch is the perfect example, in this case, as, throughout all the seasons and the movies, he unfortunately remained nothing more than the stereotype of “the gay best friend”. The creators then tried to redeem themselves by placing Stanford and Anthony’s wedding at the beginning of the second movie, but still failed to let go of the stereotypical image. The scene does nothing but showcase extravagance and opulence and, when you thought things couldn’t get more narrow-minded, Stanford responds to Carrie’s question regarding him taking Anthony’s name by simply stating “No. We’re guys.”, as if that were a proper explanation. Therefore, despite trying to achieve diversity, Sex and the City still fails to detach itself from the stereotypical representations of people of a different race or sexual persuasion.

Further on, let us take a closer look at the four main characters, considering their best and worst moments throughout the show. First of all, Carrie, the protagonist, embodies the perfectly imperfect woman. Despite being far from perfect, what is to be appreciated about Carrie is her decision to not conform to social norms, living her life by her own rules and sustaining the idea that all couples should construct their relationship to attend to their personal needs and not to society’s prejudice. Even though the audience admires her career as a successful writer and her ability to balance her professional and personal life, one can also relate to her shortcomings and failures. She can get carried away (pun intended) at times, especially when falling in love. That’s when she ends up betraying not only the trust of her friends, but also her own convictions, appearing as a bit of a hypocrite. For instance, she often judges her friend Samantha’s life choices and her multiple affairs, shaming her for her sexual liberation, although she was the only one who hadn’t judged Carrie for being a cheater. This is just one of the many examples of situations when Carrie shows surprisingly little understanding to people, despite saying she is very open-minded. Probably the worst of her actions is her sustaining her conviction that bisexuality is not a genuine sexual orientation when a guy she meets bluntly tells her he’s been with members of both sexes. The arguments she presents to her friends are simply childish and ridiculous:

When did this happen? When did the sexes get all confused? (…) You know, I did the “date the bisexual guy” thing in college, but in the end they all ended up with men. (…) I’m not even sure bisexuality exists. I think it’s just a layover on the way to “Gaytown”. (S3.E4)

What is even more disappointing is the fact that both Miranda and Charlotte take her part in this debate, leaving Samantha the only one to remain unbothered and support any kind of sexual experimentation. It might not be surprising that Charlotte, who is highly representative for the conservative housewife, is not that supportive of diversity and sexual liberations, and her statement during that same scene makes it even clearer:

I’m very into labels. “Gay”, “straight”, pick a side and stay there. (S3E4)

Moreover, Charlotte is also the one to often contradict Samantha when she thinks she crossed the line, when bluntly bringing up sex, genitals or masturbation at their usual brunch meetings. Charlotte’s incapacity to regard the world open-mindedly at times is probably a result of her being exposed to love myths and choosing to put her faith in them. Throughout the storyline, her character is continuously in search of a relationship that resembles a fairy-tale. However, her evolution pleasantly surprises the audience, as she comes to realise that the relationship she longs for is a social construct and the perfect man – a myth. As for the idea of love and soulmates, Charlotte concludes that her friends are the ones she feels closest to:

Maybe we could be each other’s soul mates. And then we can let men be just these great, nice guys to have fun with. (S4E1)

The following character to be discussed is probably the most independent, an example of strong will and intelligence. Miranda is initially skeptical about relationships, marriage and starting a family, but is the first one to have a baby out of the four women. Not only does that make her the most mature out of them, but the decision to start raising her son by herself and live alone in an apartment places Miranda on the list of the most independent female characters in television in the ‘90s. She is also known for her bluntness when she gives advice to her friends, as she ends up being the practical and rational side of every argument. Despite having her ups and downs, Miranda successfully advances through life, pursuing her career as a lawyer, while also raising a child, dealing with a cheating husband and a mother with Alzheimer's. Moreover, let us not forget one of her greatest moments during the second Sex and the City movie, when she quits a job where she is not appreciated enough in order to prioritise her health and the time spent with her family. Having been faced with some of the toughest decisions in the whole show, Miranda permanently showcases rationality, intuition, but also empathy and solidarity towards her loved ones.

Last, but certainly not least, we have probably the least problematic Sex and the City character and also one of the most iconic and revolutionary women ever in television history – Samantha Jones. It is quite hard to find any flaws in Samantha’s character, since she was the most open-minded out of the four women and also had a very complex and fun personality. However, the main reason why her character will remain relevant in television history is the fact that, throughout the seasons and the movies, she’s had some “outrageous” life choices that always went against the norms imposed by society. She revolutionised tv shows by presenting the image of a liberated, open-minded and independent woman, who wasn’t searching for the ideal romantic relationship or the perfect family, but simply wanted to enjoy life:

Listen to me. The right guy is an illusion. Start living your lives. (S1E1)

Aside from advising her friends to always choose independence and freedom, she also supports ideas she is not entirely in favour of. For instance, despite mentioning several times that she does not enjoy the company of children, she still agrees to look after Miranda’s little boy when she’s in need. Therefore, Samantha ends up not only as the best friend out of the four characters, but also as one of the freest and most original female characters portrayed in a television series. Unfortunately, she is the only one fans will not see in the remake which is in the shooting process, at the moment, and rest assured, she will be missed.

In the end, as much as I am excited to revisit these three female characters I am very fond of, I have to admit I very much doubt it that this remake is going to prove as enthralling as the initial project. However, what the show will most probably achieve is satisfying the public’s need for some good humour and high fashion, while also generating a lot of nostalgia in the hearts of the old fans. That being said, HBO, hit us with your best shot!