About Aging and Female Pleasure in Good luck to you, Leo Grande (2022)

After the death of her husband, a middle-aged woman decides to broaden her horizons and discover the true meaning of pleasure, which determines her to hire a sex worker by the name of Leo Grande, in hopes of exploring her sexuality. What could this lead to? A partially comedic, but realistic portrayal of what lack of sexual education and stigmatising sex can lead to. You might think: do we need another story about sexual liberation in the 21^st century? After all, the sexual revolution has been taking action in the US since the beginning of the 1960s, gradually raising awareness around the globe. So, hasn’t society already achieved an open-minded perspective on bodies and sexual pleasure? The simple answer is: no. In an age where unreliable social media still dictates many people’s beauty standards and female representation in visual culture is still heavily influenced by the male gaze, I’d say Good Luck to you, Leo Grande is the breath of fresh air viewers needed in 2022.

It has been acknowledged by feminist critics that women in cinema have represented, for a long time, solely the object of desire for a mainly male audience. Even though nowadays cinematographers have managed to present us with more complex and realistic female portrayals, it is still the conventionally beautiful, young, slim silhouettes that we most often see exposed on the screens. Therefore, as children, we grew up with unrealistic ideals of physical beauty on TV, and now the same representation of the female body was transferred onto platforms such as YouTube, Instagram and Tik Tok. Seeing the media praise slim, hairless, forever-young bodies can have a strange effect on women of all ages, resulting in a new kind of censorship, which is aimed at parts of our bodies that have been presented as “gross” or “shameful”.

In Digital Environments: Ethnographic Perspectives Across Global Online and Offline Spaces (2017), Gretchen Faust dedicates her chapter, “Hair, Blood and the Nipple: Instagram Censorship and the Female Body.”, precisely to this type of strange and contradictory censorship. One of the examples she provides is the one of photographer and fashion designer Petra Collins, whose Instagram account was deleted after posting a picture of her in a bikini that showcased pubic hair. While such an image is considered inappropriate, the same platform is stacked with young, “perfect”, hairless bodies that are just as exposed, but somehow not as repulsive. When asked to speak on this issue, Petra Collins stated: “I guess I was trying to combat feelings of the male gaze through my images. I wanted to create images that represented my own sexuality, not a sexuality that was dictated by someone else” (Collins, 2013). Her statement is just as relevant in the case of stretch marks, cellulite, period blood and other such features that don’t meet society’s expectations. This proves how important it is for artists to gradually break down this idealistic gender portrayals and show us real, humane individuals.

This is precisely what Katy Brand does when writing Good luck to you, Leo Grande, which not only focuses on the troubles and insecurities that come with age, but also showcases a realistic mature nude body and addresses the issue of female pleasure. From her first on-screen appearance, Susan Robinson, the female protagonist, becomes a character many people can relate to: hesitant, insecure and emotional, but also strong and determined to gain a new perspective on life. She knows she is unhappy, but what differentiates her from other similar characters is the fact that she takes the first step towards changing her mindset and being at peace with herself. However, having a strict religious upbringing which resulted in low self esteem and disregard for her own pleasure makes the woman feel ashamed of her curiosity, which is why, during their first meeting with Leo, she wants to call things off multiple times. It is clear that one of her main insecurities is her age, as she assures Leo she knows how embarrassing and unpleasant it can be for a young man to have to put up with an older, less attractive woman. Even when complimented by him, she still shows hesitation:

“Most people say, when a woman’s over about 42, that she’s sexy for her age…I was waiting for that” 

It is no surprise, then, to see her hiding behind a mask, trying to conceal her real identity which she considers too boring. Using the name Nancy Stokes, changing into more and more revealing outfits and putting forward a list of daring sexual activities represented, in my opinion, the protagonist’s attempt to please the male gaze, to become an object of desire. Funnily enough, the male character is doing something very similar. Hiding behind the attractive persona named Leo Grande, lies Connor, a young man trying to ear a living after being disowned by his mother at only 15 years old. Everything goes smoothly between the two characters, until the woman confronts Connor, confessing she looked into him and found out his real identity. As an audience, we’re unsure whether the man simply doesn’t feel at ease with clients knowing details about his real life or he is now aware that the mirage of Leo Grande has faded and doesn’t consider his real persona to be as appealing. Either way, it is undoubtedly interesting to see both of these characters try to alter their identities in order to embody stereotypes that society included into the norm. Therefore, despite being part of different generations, similar insecurities bring the characters together, showcasing how people of all ages can be affected by the standards of our society.

The movie, however, approaches the matter optimistically, as the characters find out most of the assumptions they made about the other are false and they eventually allow themselves to open up. In the end, not only do they get to know each other in the most surprising ways, but they also come to terms with their own identities. What was probably the most emotional moment to me was seeing Susan look at her naked body in the mirror, embracing her sexuality and accepting her body the way it is. When talking about this particular scene with Steven Colbert on The Late Show, Emma Thompson stated:

“I certainly can’t stand in front of a mirror without trying to improve the way I look”

The mirror scene, therefore, becomes the highlight of the movie and the actress beautifully explains its purpose in showcasing the character’s evolution:

“Through this strange intimacy, he (Leo) leads her towards the kind of pleasure that she’s never had before and unlocks her relationship with her body”

Moreover, taking her experience as a woman in showbusiness into account, Thompson plays this role so authentically, making it both comedic and vulnerable, but, most importantly, relatable for women of all ages who feel stigmatised for prioritising their own pleasure and loving their natural bodies.